coping and then some

we each have our own ways of coping.

when things (be they family or world news or health) get dicey,

i tend to peel back the layers

in an effort to

simplify

down to the core of what matters to me

so i can focus on the meat of what’s important

and not get pulled off track by the chaos (whatever form it takes).

this week, in the light of more shootings,

i prayed a lot.

i also stripped the cork board in my little workroom down to nothing and started again.

there is something so freeing to me about having less to focus on.IMG_5404+it doesn’t fix anything and it doesn’t lessen the pain,

but it does ease the clutter of thoughts in my head a bit

leaving me room to process

and to think.

then i took my 6 yr old

to his friend’s kidz planet birthday party.

maybe i was looking for something to make sense,

because world events often don’t.

sometimes in the stripped down reality of children

things seem clearer to me.

so, i’m taking photos of the kids playing.

they’re helping each other climb

up the fake rock walls.

they’re taking turns jumping into the pit of foam cubes.

they’re sliding down big blowup slides, laughing all the way.

occasionally they run into each other or yell or cut in line.

tempers flare, but it blows over quickly,

like a passing rain shower that leaves the air smelling better than before.

and the thought keeps coming to my mind,

too bad we can’t get the grown-ups of the world togetherIMG_5427sqc(both the people making decisions and the people things are being decided for)

in their stocking feet (because it’s so much harder

to feel tough or self-important that way),

to just play for awhile.

i like to believe, that without posturing or over thinking,

they’d begin to help each other out

and even laugh together at their own mistakes.

that the inevitable squabbles

might have a chance of blowing over like passing rain showers

clearing the air to create some space for change.

we sure could use some change

around here.

‘showers’ from 10:1 of zechariah.

a word for 2016

have you seen people on social media

talking about choosing their ‘word for the year’?

the idea is to pick a theme word:

to remind you of your goals, when you get distracted,

to clarify things when it all feels overwhelming.

typically, i am not

a fan of new year’s resolutions.

they seem too much like hype vs. realistic

and not enough follow through in general to interest me.

but the idea of a word, a cairn of sorts, to aid in the journey i hope to take in 2016?

the more i thought about specifically that,

the more i liked the idea.

i’m late in choosing,

but a couple of days ago out playing in the snow

i found my word (and 2016 has 49.5 wks left, so there’s plenty of time really).

i’m most often the most moved by visual things,

so here’s the photo that made me decide on the word.FullSizeRender

the word itself is ‘burrow’.

as in: to make a hole or tunnel, especially to use as a dwelling.

to me it also means a warm, safe place that you hole up in

like a bear’s winter den or even the shady tree

that a lion lives under.

for me in 2016, it means to burrow down past all the

stuff and layers (of both the physical and the emotional kinds)

that keep me from

getting at the real heart of what i want to spend my time on.

included will be weeding out distractions,

to free up both room space

and space in my head…

may the end of 2016 find me closer to being in the ‘right place’

inside and out, because i have burrowed down into the sweet spot

that has then become my burrow.

oh yeah.

‘den’ taken from 6:17 of daniel.

therefore

it is possible

to focus so fully on

what is set directly in front of you

that the rest, the things in the constantly changing periphery,

can become a bit of a blur.IMG_2111 uptoday i think maybe that’s for the very best,

otherwise the constant distractions might keep me from

seeing the bigger picture,

and my priorities might be more at risk

in an ongoing kind of way.

‘set’ taken from 12:1 of hebrews.

from right here

i find myself in the place where i am.

i determine to aim for better and then, almost as an afterthought,

i look around and invariably, i look down.IMG_1139 up sqthe truth is,

that it’s a long way down from here

so maybe, just maybe, i’m not doing as badly

as i thought i might be feeling that i was.

who knew.

(note: my current emotional state brought to you by the promised

second sneak peek photo of the new pattern ‘nyilt’

to be released tomorrow.

stay tuned…)

‘place’ taken from 28:11 of genesis.

hurdles

neil degrasse tyson,

(renowned astrophysicist, etc)

talks about his colleagues in the field of science.

actually, he is talking about all of us, in particular

those who own their specific individual diagnoses

and conquer the world irregardless.

this is good stuff. so simple and yet so profound.

when you come to a hurdle, what do you do?

you jump over it.

’nuff said.

‘world’ taken from 5:14 of matthew.

technology isn’t old school.

my new camera

(i dropped and broke old camera)

won’t behave and talk nice to the computer

until i give the new camera a nickname.

i have no idea what that’s about.

all i know is that i’m going to my first fiber fest ever

very early tomorrow morning

and i want to be able to take pictures

(not so very early in the morning).

feels like at this point that might be too much to ask.

IMG_7362naomi (new camera’s nickname) and i

did manage to take this really cool photo

of me wading through all the on-line registrations stuff.

so, i have hope that we can work things out.

maybe a snack, a little pbs and a few minutes of knitting

will reboot my head and get my thinking cleared up enough to

 take another go a negotiating a truce between naomi and the computer.

now that i think about it,

maybe the computer is mad that it doesn’t have

a nickname.  i can fix that…

‘cleared’ taken from 80:8-10 in the psalms.

no wiggle room

today is not at fast as yesterday.

thank God.  i’m not sure i could have navigated another day like that so soon.

however, today things are crisp.

crisp as in overly clear.

it’s all blindingly black and white.

i prefer this to high speed, don’t get me wrong,IMG_7056 3+++frameblowoutit’s just that i’m still reeling a bit for yesterday

and today calls for action.

lots of action.

deep breath, heartfelt prayer and forging ahead.

perhaps i’ll wake tomorrow to find things feeling more ‘normal’

…whatever ‘normal’ is.

‘tomorrow’ taken from 6:34 of matthew.